The transition to parenting
Article by the psychologist, Med. (specializing in Systemic-Family Therapy)
The role of the parent is a continuous multidimensional process that is very important as it shapes the behavior of children. Parents play their parental roles with experience and recruitment from their own families as well as from the other “important others” they encountered in their lives, such as their teachers, their relatives, their friends.
The moment of birth marks a decisive change both for parents and especially for mother and infant. This is one of the most sudden and sudden changes that occur in a person’s life.
Already the gestation period is a crucial period for the couple, and with the changes that take place, adaptation to new situations is required. Then personal, family and social changes take place at the birth of the infant. Usually, parents at first experience intense anxiety and destabilization, even when the child is a conscious and responsible choice of the couple.
In particular, the mother after birth after the feeling of relief and euphoria begins to feel a lot of times and a great concern because the sense of responsibility is too great and can often feel inadequate in working with new data. In addition, until delivery, mother was at the center of the interest and attention of the people in her environment, now neglected and the interest of all is directed to the infant.
Necessary at this stage is undoubtedly the learning of new skills related to child upbringing and the renegotiation of the couple’s relationship. It is very important to note that the dynamics of the relationship change and becomes more complex. Common problems that arise every day in the couple are the management of their time and their time, the distribution of their roles and their duties, as the care of infants requires dedication, commitment and time. When the couple’s relationship is good and positively feedbacks parental roles, problems such as everyday life that is boring and a source of problems and exhaustion are treated more successfully, otherwise a very negatively charged atmosphere is experienced, which is very aggravating.
The need for infants to meet their biological needs, as well as the management of their attachment, nervousness and parental enjoyment, are issues that worry and concern parents, but can also cause disagreements with each other. It is not so simple that parents can distinguish when the infant needs food, when he needs to sleep, when he hurts and when he is looking for a hug.
Parents in this phase often struggle to learn about the evolutionary stages of infant development and how they can contribute to it.
We note that while parenting can be considered self-evident, and given the fact that it is extremely complex, demanding and stressful, and especially nowadays, as social conditions become complicated and changes are continuous. The contribution of an expert could play a very important role the one giving answers to the angry questions of parents and on the other in the balance of the new dynamics that develops in the couple’s relationship. Also, understanding and acceptance by the specialist will help parents to clarify their doubts and concerns more easily, but also to encourage them to endeavor to cope with their difficult and demanding role.